Self-reflection is a wonderful tool. It gives us guidance when looking at where we were, where we think we’re going, and where we (think we) want to be. Part of that road of self-discovery is who you are – not just the “you” at the moment, but the whole you right down to the DNA.
Where did your family come from? What struggles did they endure? Did they struggle in the great Dust Bowl during the 1930’s or take up arms in the American Revolution? Maybe they were pastors of a small settlement in the eastern half of the country when the threat of our everyday pathogens, smallpox, or septic shock were very real and immediate dangers. We hear about car accidents in today’s world but what about death by horse and carriage? Yes, that actually happened to one of my distant ancestors.
Down to the DNA
About a year ago I received an Ancestry DNA kit for Christmas and didn’t get around to activating it until recently. It was on my mind but one of those things where we moved, I was traveling for work, etc. After activating the kit, I did the 2 week free trial and have had a blast digging through my family’s history. After filling out the first few cells of information, I pulled out some old notes I had on the family tree from almost 20 years ago to see how the internet may have helped or hindered the original lineage map. I have to give credit, though – my cousin Shirley (Bemiss) Thompson did an enormous amount of research before I got into it. A lot of what we know about our family tree is because of her dedication to genealogy prior to her passing in 2018.
One of the neatest things about the Ancestry tree maker is the “leaf” they mention in their commercials. If you’ve ever seen the ads, someone started a tree and when they populated a couple names they got their first leaf. It sounds cool, but what does it mean? What is a leaf? My wife isn’t into genealogy like I am, so I gave her a quick explanation.
The leaf gives you a hint that there are records to review that are publicly available on the internet through an array of resources. These can include cemetery records, the US census, other family trees, military records, newspaper articles, etc. It doesn’t always mean a direct hit. You’ll have to do a little sleuthing to determine if a source is accurate or not – or you can mark it undecided to come back to it later.
Mystery and Wonder
One of the biggest mysteries in my family has been around my father’s mother’s side. Her mother, as I recall, grew up in an orphanage in Chicago. Her father was unknown but she had done some digging and got a name. I did, however, connect with someone on her adopted father’s side and found a trove of pictures that were fascinating and opened up some new avenues to explore.
After spinning my wheels for a bit, I decided to explore other branches of the tree. I started finding people’s blogs that had common threads 150-200 years ago. Someone else’s grandmother shared their grandparents’ origins that connected our trees. Nicknames and middle names started to fill in blanks. Cemetery grave stones matched up confirming linkages.
On my mom’s side, I found lineage connected to Otto von Grothaus (aka Groethausen, Grotthuss, or Greathouse). Apparently, he and his family were barons to some part of the Hessen region of Germany before his children came to America. I haven’t delved into this branch of the tree too far as the last name has a lot of variations that could mislead one into Prussia, Sweden, and the Baltic states by accident. I think I’ll wait until my DNA results are back before I spend too much time in the European records.
Cousins Between 1 & n Times Removed
Back on the Bemiss side, Shirley had a short blog and exchanged pictures with other distant cousins. When I reviewed her blog along with a Hartley family blog I stumbled onto a picture of my great-grandfather’s, his brother, and his father.
It’s amazing to think about today’s standards of family compared to back then. Today the average family has 1-3 children. A hundred years ago it wasn’t uncommon to have 8-12 children. Many didn’t survive childhood due to sickness, sepsis from an injury, or even allergic reactions to relatively mundane things like wool.
I’ve been diving down each tree hoping it will unlock more mysteries or connections to my great- and great-great-grandparents’ family. Each iteration has provided a bit of information that carries over to another branch. It occasionally leads to a new picture or story that weeds out incomplete or incorrect information.
What Will Your Legacy Be?
When you look at the vastness of a giant family tree it is almost like looking at the stars. You start to feel tiny in a very large ocean. But, it does lead to some interesting introspection – how do you want to leave your legacy? If someone was going to write a eulogy about you at the end of life, what deeds and accomplishments do you want to be remembered for?
Legacy can feel like a heavy word if you’re in the early to mid stages of life. The years go by quickly and events roll by, stacking on top of each other like library books heading back to the shelf. This is why self-reflection is important. It provides us with the necessary course corrections, large and small, during our journey so we can be remembered the way we want to be remembered.
